Many relationships endure bouts of jealously or moments of doubt. These feelings can manifest in any number of ways: picking a fight, trying to make him jealous, acting jealous, trying to manipulate him into saying what you want to hear or taking an online, does my boyfriend still love his ex quiz. Even within perfectly healthy, happy relationships at some point one of you will open the “ex-files.” When this happens you may wonder, does my boyfriend still love his ex and even wonder, will my boyfriend go back to his ex?
If you find yourself thinking this try not to be too hard on yourself, it happens to most of us. Obviously your boyfriend and his ex had some sort of connection or love or they wouldn’t have dated and knowing that your boyfriend shared these feelings with someone else can feel crummy. However, it is important to determine if your worrying is fleeting and normal or if you are becoming obsessed with wondering, does my boyfriend miss his ex? There are a few gauges you can use to decide if your fears are well founded or if you are just moving through the growing pains of a new relationship.
Does your boyfriend still talk to his ex all the time and/or does he still talk about her all the time? If your boyfriend is still very enmeshed in his ex’s life then it may indicate that he is not over the relationship.
Does your boyfriend keep mementoes from his previous relationship? Do they seem sacred or special to him? Are they scattered throughout his home? If your boyfriend surrounds himself with reminders of his ex he may not be over the relationship.
Does your boyfriend keep tabs on his ex? Does he know if she is dating someone new, where she will be on any given night and does he make plans accordingly (either to make sure he is there or make sure he is not there)? If he is still this interested in his ex’s life, even without speaking to her, he may not be over the relationship.
With any relationship concerns, it is important to have an honest discussion with your boyfriend about how you are feeling. You may want to point out the specific behaviors that are causing you to doubt his commitment to your relationship (see above). It is only by sharing your fears and hearing his reaction, and seeing if he takes action to correct his behavior that you can make an informed decision about whether he is truly present in your relationship.